


Just Give Me a Reason

by Notashamed



Category: The Avengers (2012), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom, Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-14
Updated: 2015-05-09
Packaged: 2017-12-20 05:03:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/883253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Notashamed/pseuds/Notashamed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They were a surprise, to everyone, but mostly to Darcy. But how she loves him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Totally not my usual thing; angst and drama and that crap. For a bit I had been feeling all kinds of personal relationship angst and I love this song. I've been dying to write Tony and Darcy, so this is what I came up with. Thanks to my beta, krystal214, who corrects me and makes me better.

I try struggling, but it's of no use. His magical grip is just that - magic. And I'm just a lowly human according to him, and damn if I'm not truly feeling like one at the moment. I look to my left and see that Pepper's not doing any better and that makes me feel the smallest bit better.

Loki floats above Iron Man as the other Avengers are fighting off more of his thugs. His voice carries as destruction surrounds us. Then Loki drops the bomb on all of us, the fucking bastard. "Man of Iron, could you choose?"

Tony says nothing. He just stands on the helipad - why does it always come down to Tony's building? - wearing his battle-dinged suit watching Loki fly around me, touching me, making my skin crawl.

Tony's faceplate flips up and I've never seen him angrier. He shouts, "Don't you fucking touch her!"

Loki just laughs before calling to Tony. "If it were to come down to your young, vibrant, well-endowed bride or the love of your past life and perhaps love of it still, the one who made you a man instead of the weak, sniveling reprobate you once were, could you choose?"

My eyes widen. What the fuck is he talking about? I look down at Tony, whose eyes are wide with fear. Honest to god fear.

Tony yells at Loki as he starts to inch closer to the edge of the helipad. Did I mention we're floating however many goddamn stories high above New York City? Because we totally are. "Let them go. Fuck you, you goddamn bastard. Take me, take your brother, fuck, take this goddamn city but leave them alone!"

Loki gets in my face and I really wish to hell the others were in the vicinity. He grips my jaw forcing me to look at him. He gets closer and speaks solely to me. "Does it bother you, wench, knowing that you're just some plaything to him? That he could never love you as he loved her? She who made him the man he is. She and countless others have felt him between their legs. He's probably made the same promises to her that he did to you. How does that feel knowing that ring adorning your hand might as well be made of glass for all it's worth?"

Not going to lie, after everything he said it might have felt a little better if he just stabbed me straight in my heart. Not the crap about Tony fucking countless others because he is _motherfucking Tony Stark_ , and hell, I didn't come into our relationship a blushing virgin. No, that isn't it at all. It's the stuff about Pepper because no matter how much Tony tries telling me, proving to me, it sometimes catches me off guard that maybe I am just a stand-in. That maybe I am with him solely because she is not.

I don't even realize I'm crying until I hear Tony screaming at me, asking me what Loki did. I shake my head and then I'm no longer floating. Loki has a grip on my body and then I realize he is holding Pepper as well a moment before my world is flipped upside down. No, literally, the fucker has a grip on both of us by one of our ankles.

Tony screams as Loki speaks, "Choose."

Then I'm falling.

Falling.

There are screams. My own, I guess.

Tears.

It's just seconds, but it feels like an eternity. I pray. Not for my life. I pray that Tony moves past this. I pray that he doesn't close himself off to the world and lets love in again. I pray that whoever gets the blessed opportunity to love him and be loved by him be worthy of such greatness.

Then it stops. And it fucking hurts. My ears are ringing. My throat is raw. And I'm in his arms. His faceplate is up and he's telling me to hold on.

I want to say something, but he cuts me off and yells in my face at some point past my shoulder, "Fuck, I love you, Pepper!"

And I'm broken. And Pepper's dead.

**_Right from the start_ **  
**_You were a thief_**  
**_You stole my heart_ **  
**_And I your willing victim_ **  
**_I let you see the parts of me_ **  
**_That weren't all that pretty_ **  
**_And with every touch you fixed them_ **

At her funeral a little less than a week later, I stand behind him. He's not said more than two words to me this entire week. He’s barely slept and the sunglasses are doing a fab job of hiding the bags under his eyes.

After Tony flew me to the ground, he looked me over and then just held me until Steve came over and broke the news about Pepper. Then Tony left me standing there with Steve looking sadly at me. I walked myself over to medical - alone.

Now we're standing in some cemetery staring at her headstone while S.H.I.E.L.D. helicopters fly overhead to keep the piranhas that are the news media away. I stand still as Tony passes by me, not evening looking at me.

**_Now you've been talking in your sleep, oh, oh_ **  
**_Things you never say to me, oh, oh_**  
**_Tell me that you've had enough_ **  
**_Of our love, our love_ **

Tony and I were a surprise. Like for real. It happened at one of his parties, post Battle of NYC, and after he defeated the Mandarin who really wasn't a bad guy but it turned out the creepy other guy was. It was after he had the surgery to remove the arc reactor from his chest and after he took out whatever little itty bitty things had been living inside Pepper. After they had broken up. So yeah, he was drunk and sarcastic and I liked him that way. I still do.

_Tony stumbles up to me, some pretty young blonde on his arm. He pulls down his sunglasses and leers at me, making me feel like I'm standing in front of him in just my bra and panties, which wouldn't be the most horrible thing ever._

_He points a wobbly finger at me. "You're the nerd herder."_

_Blonde laughs like he's Rodney Dangerfield at the Improv. I roll my eyes and fight the urge to cover my chest. Instead, I straighten my back and make the girls jut out just a little bit more. "Yeah, that's me."_

_He just stares me in the eye, assessing me, making me realize he's not as drunk as I thought he was. He blinks and straightens up, shaking off Blondie. She pouts and whines at him._

_He turns to her, "You can leave now. Go find someone else to try to fuck. You never had a chance. You were a placeholder, nothing more."_

_She huffs and storms off, cursing him out while he just stares at me again. I glare at him. "You're a douche and that was totally not necessary."_

_He shrugs, "Sometimes people need that kick in the ass. She's more than a warm body and dumbing herself down so she could get into my bed and maybe have me drop some diamonds in her purse isn't the way to live one's life. It was a life lesson."_

_I raise an eyebrow at him. "Well, in that case, you're a saint. Excuse me."_

_I go to walk past him, but he grabs my arm. I look at his hand before looking back at his face. With a goddamn smirk, he says, "Let's walk. I got a proposition for you, nerd herder."_

_I growl out, "It's Darcy."_

_He just smiles. "I know."_

**_Just give me a reason_ **  
**_Just a little bit's enough_**  
**_Just a second we're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **  
**_It's in the stars_ **  
**_It's been written in the scars on our hearts_ **  
**_We're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **

_We wound up in his lab. He gives me a quick tour, introduces me to his children (robots), and shows me where the liquor is._

_Tony smiles at me as we stand by the elevators, neither one of us making any move to press the button._

_Then he speaks, "So you up for it?"_

_I'm a bit confused and am pretty sure it shows on my face. "Up for what? I thought this was some long drawn out ploy to get me into bed?"_

_He laughs. "That's bullshit and you know it. Plus, I don't make ploys to get women into my bed."_

_I try to ignore the little bit of heat that settles in my belly at those words. God, why does he have to be so goddamn yummy? I curse my life that has me surrounded by all these hot ass men that aren't available to be my personal dildos. The gods hate me._

_He's just smirking at me as if he knows what I'm thinking. He repeats himself, "So, Darcy aka nerd herder, are you up for it?"_

_I shrug my shoulders. "I'm not sure what 'it' is."_

_He moves closer to me and I bite my lip. Don't focus on his beard thingie because really that kind of scruff will just chafe the skin in between your legs. I'm pressed against the glass - bullet proof, Hulk proof, tank proof - that separates us from his lab._

_"Are you going to come work here and be the Avengers' nerd herder?"_

_I sputter, "Wha...?"_

_He just continues, "The pay is better. I mean seriously better. I've already started the preliminary work on Dr. Foster's lab. I'll just need her input on the design aspect. I mean, I saw what she was working with in New Mexico and I'm thinking anything other than that is an upgrade. Bruce already has his own lab a couple floors down. I like to keep the labs a few floor separated so if something goes kaboom in one, it won't take out the others."_

_I chime in, "Of course. Let's buffer the labs."_

_He nods, hands moving and now there are floaty computer monitor hologram things in front of him. Is he for real? "Jarvis, start taking notes."_

_He just starts speaking and next thing I know we are in the elevator and on his private floor. I'm in Tony Stark's living room as he babbles about this and that and, hey are those the specs of Jane's lab out in New Mexico, and holy fuck, the new ones at S.H.I.E.L.D?_

_Apparently, I've spoken out loud as Tony answers me. "Yeah, their security is shit by the way. Tell Dr. Foster that her latest equation won't work..."_

_Insert way too many science words I don't know._

_"...so, yeah, that's why it keeps faltering at that part. Oh, and I also have a communal lab built for when all of us want to get our science on. And, hey, since she and Fabio never really got together, will it be an issue? I mean, he does stay here when on Earth, but the building is over 80 stories high, so there's plenty of...oomph..."_

_Enough talking. He's been talking for close to an hour. Who knew science could actually be sexy? Or maybe it's just that fucking look in his eyes as he babbles about this crap. So yeah, my tongue in his mouth is a much better option. I break the kiss and take a step back, going to unzip my dress when Tony shakes his head._

_I raise an eyebrow because I might not be as smart as him or Jane, but I know a twitching dick just fine and the woody he's starting to sport in those deliciously fine slacks can be considered a clue._

_He walks over to me and grabs my hand to walk me to the elevator. Before he presses the button I pull his hand away. I stand in front of him, blocking the button, and force him to meet my eyes. There's an uncertainty there that sort of breaks my heart._

_"Ms. Lewis..."_

_I huff out, "It's Ms. Lewis now?"_

_He gives me a half smile. "Look nerd herder, it's not that you're not hot..."_

_And he's off monologuing again so I walk around him to take a seat on his super bad ass couch and realize as he's speaking that he keeps rubbing his chest. The light bulb flashes above my head. Okay, it really doesn't, but wouldn't that be totally awesome?_

_I stand and unzip my dress, letting it slide to the floor. I step out of the pooled material and place my hands on my hips, hoping I'm pulling this off and not looking like a total dweeb. He pauses as he looks at me standing there in my Vickie's._

_I walk over to him and wrap my arms around his neck, kind of happy that with my 3 inch heels that make me only an inch shorter than him. "I don't care about the blue thingie that used to be in your chest. And if you got some creepy surgery scars that you're embarrassed about, keep your undershirt on." I lick along his neck, enjoying how he shudders. "What I do care about is between your legs."_

_I take a step back and unhook my bra, letting it slide to the floor. "You're fun. I'm wicked fun. You seem cooler than the normal douche character you portray on TV. So, let's have some fun together and you can talk sexy science to me which I will continue to not understand as you convince me to leave 'the man' with my scientist in tow and sell our souls to you instead."_

_Tony licks his lips, and that fire that was in his eyes earlier? Totally back. "First, I'm more wicked fun than you on any given day. I'm fucking Tony Stark. Two, sexy science talk? Three, there was no mention of selling your souls, but I might have to add an amendment that keeps you naked in heels into your contract. Fourth, I'm not embarrassed because, referring back to the first point, I'm fucking Tony Stark."_

_He starts to strip and when he whips off his undershirt, I don't gasp or cringe at his chest. Where the blue thingie was is a clusterfuck of scar tissue, but as I raise my eyes to meet his stare, I really don't care._

_I lick my lips and start moving towards the couch. "You going to take off the pants?"_

_He just laughs and drops those bad boys and holy fuck, Tony Stark goes commando. "Oh my."_

_He laughs and it's a real one. His eyes crinkle at the corners. "You ain't seen nothing yet. Jarvis?"_

_Jarvis speaks, and I'm still trying to get accustomed to him. "Sir?"_

_Tony stalks towards me, smirk firmly in place. "Play some music. Dim the lights. I'm about to educate Ms. Lewis."_

_Cue the butterflies in my stomach. Tony yanks my body to his and we're kissing in the middle of his living room that has huge ass windows from ceiling to floor. Too bad we're not on a lower floor. That would totally catch someone's eye. I giggle and Tony stops his ministrations on my shoulder._

_He kisses me roughly and I lose my ability to think. He breaks the kiss with a quick nibble to my jaw. "If you're giggling, then I'm not doing this right."_

_Before I can make a smart comment, I'm up in his arms with no choice but to wrap my legs around his waist. He's pretty strong out of the suit because even though I'm a bit short, I got some weight to me. Then I'm slammed against some wall in some hallway and I can't remember my name when his fingers push my panties to the side and enter me._

_I hiss out, "Fuck Stark..."_

_He's the one that laughs now. "That's better. Much better, but not good enough. We can so do better."_

_I am trying to not to beg him to let me come. "How much better?"_

_He grins before ripping my panties off. He orders me, "Put your heels on the wall."_

_I smile because_ Less than Zero _is one of my fave movies and that part of it always looked so fucking hot even though it wasn't Robert Downey Jr. in it. Then I cry out Tony's name (because when a person's penis is inside you, it's just polite to use their first name) in a hoarse cry._

_He's pounding into me. I mean, for real, the walls are sort of shaking. I am scratching his back and arms as he pistons deep inside me. He's yanking my hair to pull my head back. His teeth are being treated to the skin of my throat. He's moving faster, deeper and then I'm screaming._

_"Tony! Fuck, fuck, please...please...yesss..."_

_I cum and cum and then he's ramrod straight as I feel him gushing inside me. My legs feel like jelly as they slide to the floor. I laugh when I see the marks my heels leave behind. Tony holds my body against the wall with his._

_He looks over his shoulder and smiles. He turns his face back to me and presses his lips against mine in a gentle kiss. "I think I might leave those there."_

_I smile before cringing at the thought of having to do the walk of shame sans panties. Hell, I think I left my purse in his lab._

_He bobs my nose with a finger. "Where do you keep wandering off to?"_

_I shake my head. "Don't mind me. Just thinking if I need you to go down to your lab. I left my purse there. And it should be easy..."_

_His mouth cuts me off. He pulls away and smirks at me. "We're nowhere near done, Darcy."_

_He pulls me down the hall into his bedroom. And yep, I was right. Next morning/afternoon when I wake up I have goatee burn on my inner thighs._

**_I'm sorry I don't understand_ **  
**_Where all of this is coming from_**  
**_I thought that we were fine_ **  
**_(Oh, we had everything)_ **  
**_Your head is running wild again_ **  
**_My dear we still have everythin'_ **  
**_And it's all in your mind_ **  
**_(Yeah, but this is happenin')_ **

It's been roughly two months of silence from the man I love. I have tried to be understanding. I've given him space and have said nothing about his drinking; hell, I'm the one replenishing his alcohol. I bite my lip. I just can't take it anymore.

"Mrs. Stark, I implore you. If you would just speak to sir..."

I shake my head while continuing to pack. "That's rich, J-man. He doesn't speak. Wait, correction, he doesn't speak to me. He speaks to you. He speaks to his science homies. He speaks to the Avengers, but not to me. I can take a hint. So I'm just going to go stay with my parents for a bit, give him the space that he so desperately needs from me, and figure out how one divorces a billionaire."

Jarvis sounds resigned. "As you wish, Mrs. Stark."

I huff out, my voice breaking, "I told you stop calling me that, Jarvis, especially now."

"It's your name. Says so on all your credit cards." I hear from behind me.

I quickly wipe my eyes and turn around to look at him. Weeks without a direct word spoken to me and that's what I get? But he spoke, to me, so I'll take it. God, with the way my insides are fluttering about you would think he's reciting Shakespeare to me.

Tony leans against the doorway, and god, he looks so tired. Fuck, has he been going out on missions like that? I want to touch him, but I just don't know if he wants me to. I just don't know a damn thing anymore.

So I reach deep inside myself and turn on the snark full blast. "I have one card that you keep stuffing into my wallet, no matter how many times I take it out. Nice to see you sans bloodshot eyes. Surprised that you're sober since it's past five o'clock."

**_You've been havin' real bad dreams, oh, oh_ **  
**_You used to lie so close to me, oh, oh_**  
**_There's nothing more than empty sheets_ **  
**_Between our love, our love_ **  
**_Oh, our love, our love_ **

He flinches and I take that small victory. He steps into the room and sits on the bed, our bed, before placing a hand on top of mine. I don't know how I manage to breathe.

We say nothing for who knows how long. Finally I look at him and there are tears in his eyes. That breaks my heart, what little is left intact. He hasn't cried at all. I have asked Jarvis and the others, and they all have told me that he has shed no tears. The fact that he has them in his eyes now gives me the tiniest bit of hope.

**_Just give me a reason_ **  
**_Just a little bit's enough_**  
**_Just a second we're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **  
**_I never stopped_ **  
**_You're still written in the scars on my heart_ **  
**_You're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **

He removes his hand and I'm missing him again already. He stands and walks over to the window that shows off the city exceptionally. "I didn't think it would take this long. I took every day as a little bit of a miracle. Fuck, I'm surprised that you stayed as long as you have."

I whirl on him, chucking whatever I can at his body. Shirts. Jeans. Bras. "What? So you've been pushing me away so I would leave you, and now you're what? Disappointed it took this long? That's why you're crying?! FUCK YOU! If you wanted me gone, then you should have manned up and been _Tony_ _Stark_ and told me to get the hell out with divorce papers stapled to my ass. I could have dealt with that, not this silent treatment bullshit that has been eating away at me. You're a fucking cunt! And yeah, I'm so over this crap, and look at that you made me use the C-word. You know it's forbidden."

He's staring at me, just staring. My chest is heaving and I just can't do this anymore. I look at him and my voice is so small, so soft. "If you don't love me, you could have told, oomph..."

I'm in his arms. He's wrapped tight around me. There's no way to tell where I end and he begins. His tongue is invading my mouth. His hands are touching me reverently just like he used to, like before. But it's not before; it's now and we're a mess.

I push him away. "What the hell is your problem?"

He's yelling back, "I thought, I thought, fuck, I thought you were leaving me because you finally wised up!"

I shake my head. "Wised up?"

He rubs his face. "I thought you finally realized you're worth more than being here with me."

Cue the light bulb. I sigh. "You're an idiot. Tony, when I married you, I married all of you. The dude that drinks liquor like its water. The guy that forgets dates because he's having science sex with Bruce or Jane or both. The guy that decides on a whim that if we're having Italian we might as well fly to Italy. The guy that can make my toes curl by simply kissing me. All. Of. You."

I step closer to him so I can run my hands along his chest, smiling as his body shudders when I play with the edge of the arc reactor. "Remember when I told you to get it back? Or remake it, or whatever? I mean, I take total credit for its triumphant return."

He nods, pulling me closer to him, tears streaming down his face. "God Darcy, god, you're my… my fucking everything."

_This thing with me and Tony? Well what started out as a friends with benefits kind of thing sort of grew. I mean, there's tons of sex, but after a couple of months it started changing into sexless phone calls about our day and texts of what we were doing later that didn't involve emoticons in sexual positions. Things like if he could pick me up and maybe we could get a bite to eat. There are sleepovers too, and before I realize it I’m falling for the guy. I curse my sanity._

_Right now I'm getting ready for some gala he needs a date for. He sent Happy over earlier with a ridiculously over-priced dress and all the trimmings. I bite my lip when I see that I have less than twenty minutes until he gets here. I slide the cool silk on, pursing my lips at my reflection. God, I feel like I'm playing dress up. I slip into the heels and giggle when I see the heel's no bigger than three inches. He likes me a little bit shorter than him. I quickly apply a little mascara, lipstick and blush when there's a knock on the door. I shake out my wild mass of curls and hope that anti-frizz serum I spent forty bucks on works._

_I throw open the door and he's standing there in all his Armani glory. He pulls his sunglasses down and licks his lips. "You look gorgeous. I wonder if I'm really needed tonight. I would rather slide under that dress and find out what kind of underwear you have on."_

_I laugh and grab my small clutch. I drag him down the hallway to my rickety elevator. "Yes, because for one thing Pepper texted me. And I don't even want to know how she got my number or how weird that is." The elevator door opens and we step inside. I lean into him, nibbling on his earlobe. "Second, I'm not wearing any underwear."_

_He hisses, "Fuck...Darcy..."_

_The door opens and we step out into the humid NYC air. Happy opens the limo door for me and Tony glares at me when he sits beside me. "That's not nice. Now as I mingle with all those rich bastards all I'm going to think of is how upset Mayor Bloomberg would get if I bent you over the table and fucked you."_

_That image makes heat pool in my belly. He leans to kiss me but I shake my head. "No way, you start that and we're never going to make it."_

_The gala is boring. I mean, seriously, rich folks are boring. I'm about to tell Tony that I've had enough when some douche starts in about how well Pepper is doing on the other coast and that wanting to know how life is without the arc reactor in his chest. The scumbag also wants to know if Tony feels like a less productive member of the Avengers. Tony smiles and laughs everything the fucker says off, but I see the look in his eyes and I hate it._

_After fuckhead wanders off I drag Tony by his hand to get the hell out of here. Happy opens the door for me and Tony slides into the limo woodenly. He's saying nothing. I lower the partition and tell Happy to drive aimlessly for a bit._

_Tony raises an eyebrow. "Getting comfy with my staff, Lewis?"_

_I say nothing. I reach behind my neck and untie the knot that holds up my dress. I let it slide off my body and Tony's breath hitches. I take off my bra and straddle his body. He runs his hands along my bare skin._

_I nibble on his jaw. I pull back and am happy to see some of the tension leave his body. "Ya know I have that issue of_ Playgirl. _" He just looks at me so I continue. "I mean I've never bought the magazine before, but when I heard that you posed for it after refusing all those other magazines and TV shows to show off the arc reactor, I thought that was so bad ass. No_ _, Barbara Walters, you can't get me to take off my shirt, but for a bunch of randy girls, sure why not? Only you can build something like that, drop the bomb that you're Iron Man, stop building weapons for the government, and wrap it all up by posing in_ Playgirl _."_

_He smirks. "I thought it was quite tasteful."_

_I laugh as I run my hands through his hair. He's stopped putting so much crap in it because I asked nicely. Okay, so I might have asked as he was balls deep in me, but still I asked. "Yes, Tony, you in nothing but a thong on a horse is very tasteful a la Fabio. The one of you in front of the fireplace on the bearskin rug was my personal fave though."_

_He nods before lowering his head to my nipple. He sucks and bites and has me writhing in his lap against his quite evident interest in our goings on. He releases it with a pop and looks at me uncertain. "Do you think I'm less without it?"_

_I shake my head. "Hell no, you still kick ass as Iron Man. I know you got rid of it for Pepper, but I think that you shouldn't have because it's a part of you. Not for the power and keeping you alive thing, but because of what it represents. You built that in some god forsaken cave in the middle of the dessert with camel crap. That was the birth of Iron Man. It was the rebirth of Tony Stark."_

_I swallow, uncomfortable with how emotional I sound. Uncomfortable with how in love with him I am. "Um, and yeah it was totally bad ass."_

_He just looks at softly before pressing his mouth to mine. He breaks the kiss. "I think I might just love you, Darcy Lewis."_

**_Oh, tear ducts and rust_ **  
**_I'll fix it for us_**  
**_We're collecting dust_ **  
**_But our love's enough_ **  
**_You're holding it in_ **  
**_You're pouring a drink_ **  
**_No nothing is as bad as it seems_ **  
**_We'll come clean_ **

Tony kisses me again. "I love you, Darcy, so fucking much. I've been keeping away because I thought, well, I thought that you thought less of me. Less because I couldn't save Pepper. Hell, I didn't even think of going after her. I just, fuck, I just couldn't let **you** die. You're everything."

I am crying now as I kiss him, ours tears mixing. We break apart to help me start undressing. Words have to be said. Lots of them actually, but I, we, need this more. Soon I'm naked and spread out on the bed. I'm surprised he actually took the time to shove my suitcase off of it.

I look at him. "You're way too dressed."

He stands at the edge of the bed and starts undressing. "Jarvis?"

"Sir?"

Tony drops his t-shirt before unzipping his jeans. "Can you tell the team that..."

Jarvis cuts in joyfully, "That you and Mrs. Stark are reconnecting at the present time?"

I laugh, "Holy crap, J-man, did you just make a sexual innuendo?"

He huffs coyly, "I am afraid I do not understand, Mrs. Stark. Sir, I shall inform the team that you shall miss this evening’s meal."

**_Just give me a reason_ **  
**_Just a little bit's enough_**  
**_Just a second we're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **  
**_It's in the stars_ **  
**_It's been written in the scars on our hearts_ **  
**_That we're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **

He's on top of me, just breathing me in like he has to re-familiarize himself with me. I can't help but cry as the familiar and greatly missed weight of him presses me down into the mattress. I yank his hair, enjoying the groan that comes from him.

I kiss him with everything I have and it still doesn't feel like enough. I break away and scowl at him, "You're too skinny."

He rolls his eyes and grinds his lower half against my lower half, and well, who cares how gaunt he looks? Oh wait, I do. I bite his jaw. "None of that, you know you're too skinny." I take his face in my hands. "You have to stop. You have to sleep. You have to eat. Uh uh, I mean more than the olives in your martinis. You have... fuck, you have to talk to someone."

He pulls away to get onto his knees. He spreads my legs further apart. The room is getting darker as the sun sets, offsetting the blue light from his arc reactor quite nicely. He kisses my ankles. He kisses my calves. He presses kisses to each of my toes.

He lets my legs go and just stares at me. "I know... I know that I need help. It's like the panic attacks from before. And I know I can't put it all on you." His eyes lock onto mine. "It was part of the reason I've kept away. Because I know all this, yet I just want you to be the one to pull me up and it's not fair. You're not..."

I scramble up the bed to rest against the headboard. I finish his sentence, "I'm not Pepper. I can't be her for you."

His face scrunches up. "I know you're not Pepper. I don't want..." His eyes narrow. "What the fuck did Loki say to you?"

I wipe at my eyes. "He...fuck, Tony, he just ate away at my fears. How I'm not Pepper and she's who you want. That I'm just some fucking stand-in..."

He cuts me off, going from between my legs to grab at my face, pressing kisses all over. "Fuck, Darcy, baby, I know you're not Pepper. I never fucking ever got with you because I needed a stand-in. I needed – need - you. I'll always need you."

I can't help it. I start to cry. "But you... you shouted out that you loved her. What the fuck was I supposed to think? You haven't spoken to me in a couple of months. The last words I heard from your mouth are the ones stating how much you love her."

I feel my chest heaving and I just want out. Out of the bed. Out of NY. Out of this mess. I go to move, but he slams my body down into the mattress. One of his hands find my wet heat and I curse myself for being so weak.

**_Just give me a reason_ **  
**_Just a little bit's enough_**  
**_Just a second we're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **  
**_It's in the stars_ **  
**_It's been written in the scars on our hearts_ **  
**_That we're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **

Then he's pulling his fingers out and slamming his dick into me. I scream, from pleasure, from pain, from everything. His pace is relentless. I am scratching at his back, kissing his lips, breathing him in.

He breaks our kiss and slows his movements. "I told her I loved her because I do. There's too much that happened between us for me not to. I screamed it because I knew that she was going to die. I wanted her to hear those words instead of me apologizing for not being enough to save you both, but baby, I couldn't let you die. I just wanted her to feel cared for in those last moments."

I open my mouth and close it. I run my fingers along his face, memorizing every bit with my touch. He closes his eyes as he moves inside me. I kiss his lips softly. I whisper his name, "Tony."

His eyes snap open and the look is there. That look he gets when he has a science orgasm. That look he gets when something has his utmost attention. That look of determination and concentration, and it's on me. I finally get it. He's mine. No one else's.

I breathe him in. "You're a good man, Tony Stark. A very good man, and all mine."

He nods his head enthusiastically as his hips snap against mine. "Yours, Darcy, all fucking yours. God, baby, I've missed you. Missed this."

I arch my back as he slides in and out of me. I cry out, "Yes, yes, please... more... god, Tony... more..."

His thrusts start to get harder, deeper. "All yours. You will take all of me. All of me, goddamn it..."

I am wailing at how good he feels. "Yes, yes, baby... fuck, yes... Tony, all yours. I am all.... yessss... yours... ughhhh..."

The orgasm is swift and blinding. I can feel my toes curling and my heart racing. He pushes into me a couple more times before cumming, screaming my name. He collapses on top of me and I rub his sweaty back lovingly.

He rolls over onto his back, taking me with him. It feels kind of funny when his dick slides out of me, but I'm in no rush to get cleaned up. He presses a kiss to the top of my head. "I love you, Darcy Lewis hyphen Stark."

I pick my head up, "It's Darcy Stark. Don't get it twisted."

He just smiles and wraps me up in his arms. I fall asleep to the soft hum of his arc reactor.

**_Oh, we can learn to love again_ **  
**_Oh, we can learn to love again_ **  
**_Oh, oh, that we're not broken just bent_ **  
**_And we can learn to love again_ **

 


	2. Tony Says What?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's still so fragile between us and then Tony throws that out there?

I wake up to kisses on my belly. I manage to open up one eye to see my still hubby rubbing his lips against my soft belly. Natasha killer abs? Nope not here. I won’t ever have those and I’ve made my peace with that. Sort of. Sometimes. I mean my boobs would look even more banging if I had her stomach. Just saying.

“Ouch…” I glare at the playful look in his eyes as his soft kisses turn into nibbles with teeth to get my attention back where it should be. On him, of course. “We should have a baby.” I sit up, bang his face against parts of my body he is already wicked familiar with, but that doesn’t stop him from crying out. Opps, maybe that hurt his nose? Wait, he said baby!

“Baby? Huh?! I need at least three orgasms to even…” I flop back onto the bed like a fish out of water. He lies beside me. I let out a breath and approach this as though he’s a big predator cat and I’m the most delish catnip on the planet. “Honey…baby…boobie…”

He mock glares at me, “Pookie, we have never done the icky pet names. Let’s not start now.” I pout, “You never let me have any fun, pumpkin.” He groans. “Anyway, we just got back together like, um, Jarvis how long have we been back together? What the hell time is it? It’s still dark o’clock right? Tony, I cannot handle these life altering moments back to back like this!”

Jarvis haughtily informs me, “Mrs. Stark it is 2:34 in the morning. Since you and sir reunited approximately around 5:30 this evening, you have been back together eight hours.”

I gape at Tony while motioning wildly with my hands. “See? Eight hours and of those eight hours, I’ve only slept for like a couple of hours, which totally means you probably just fucking napped and wait, why am I rambling? What the fuck is going on right now?” He sits up and pulls me between his legs…oh he’s still naked…focus Darcy on what’s going rather than his still wet with my pussy juice cock…hmmm…huh? He laughs and I guess I said that last bit out loud.

Tony sweetly kisses my bare shoulder before straightening up. “Darcy, we can fuck in a bit and if I can just throw it out there, you already had three orgasms. Two by my cock and one with me eating you out and sucking all our juices out from that pretty, pretty pussy.” Of course this declaration of his sexual prowess makes my lady bits tingle, but I am stronger than this. I tased a god! There are sonnets written about me in Asgard!

“Tony, a baby?” I am quite proud that my voice doesn’t squeak or crack. Not even a tiny bit.

He places his chin on my shoulder and says nothing so we just sit there in the silence. I like to pretend that even this high up I can still hear the sounds of the city. J-man is actually uber cool and plays me traffic noises sometimes, especially when Tony is off doing his science thing during the night.

I’m not sure how long we sit there, but I might have actually started drooling when he starts talking softly. “When I was being an asshole,” I turn my head to look back at him with my brows raised. He corrects himself, “When I was being an asshole this time, I would barely sleep. I couldn’t. There were nightmares mostly, but when I could actually bring myself up to our room, to our bed, I could sleep better because your smell was still on the sheets…on your pillow. Your perfume would still be in the air.”

I feel tears well up in my eyes. I say his name brokenly, “Tony…”

He places another soft kiss on my shoulder, “Shhh. It’s okay. Let me finish. When I would sleep in our bed because it’s as close to you as I felt I ever deserved, I would dream. The last couple of times I dreamt, it was of me holding a baby. Details were a bit fuzzy but he was ours. I would wake up and cry because it hadn’t been real and fuck it all to hell Darce, I wanted it to be real. So bad. So much.”

I whisper, “You told me no when I brought it up the one time.”

He sighs sadly, “I was so afraid of being like my dad. So afraid that I would mess up. Hell, I’m not even sure how we’ve survived this long. It’s the ridiculously awesome sex, right?”

I shake my head and snuggle further into his body, “We’re so much more than just ridiculously awesome sex Tony.”

I can feel him swallow as he gathers his thoughts. He clears his throat. “I know that. I know that then when you brought it up on our honeymoon...”

I snort out, “You brushed me off and then distracted me with sex…”

He laughs, and god it’s so good to hear him laugh, “Yeah, well you’re the one that brought up _Indecent Proposal_ and fucking on a bed full of money. I was only trying to please my wife.” We both laugh at that. He starts talking again, softly as if afraid. “Then after this shit with Pepper dying and me praying each day that you would stay another, I realized that I could do the father thing as long as I had you. I realized that we would so fucking rock out the parenting thing because we are just that cool. Then I wasn’t just dreaming about it while I slept, but while I was awake. Like could I build a Baby Bjorn into the suit? How open would you be to a crib that could hover powered by repulsers?”

I flinch, “Okay dude, that kind of talk right there? So not swaying me to procreating with you. Just saying.”

He wraps his arms around me tighter as if he’s afraid I’ll leave. Silly man. He starts back up. “Okay so no cutting edge baby tech - got it. But I was seriously starting to look into how I could baby proof the lab. Trying to figure out how I could convince DUM-E to give up the fire extinguisher for a pacifier instead…”

I cut him off, turning my body around, kneeling with my hands on hips. “There’s no way in hell DUM-E is being our nanny. Are you fucking kidding me?!”

His eyes glaze over as they get stuck on my boobs. I snap my fingers in his face. He smirks at me, “Nanny?”

My mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water. I roll my eyes. “Hypothetical nanny…”

He sits up and leans forward to capture my mouth with his. Earlier when this was all desperation and uncertainty, now it's serenity. I wind up straddling him and his tool of impregnation? It’s ready to put the work in. I wrap my hand around his dick, stroking him jus the way that drives him insane. I lick up the side of his neck and bite down on his earlobe. His dick twitches in my hand. I whisper in his ear, “How about we be overachievers on our reconciliation and I take this baby business under consideration, but we practice our baby making skills just in case?”

He tackles me back onto the bed. “It’s on.” I can’t reply. I’m too busy screaming his name as he slides into me. His thrusts are wicked and I swear the bed is moving or maybe I’m just having a religious out of body experience, but what I do know is that my toes are curling. I know that his dick is hitting that sweet spot inside of me that only it knows. I sigh out his name as his lips find mine. I also know that a baby with his eyes and hair would make my heart melt, but let’s just keep that to myself for now.


End file.
